NEW YORK CITY -- In a vain attempt to pacify the already furious gods, mass burnings and slaughter of animals are being planned in preparation of the upcoming Federal Open Market Committee meeting.
    "The great bear has eaten the liver of the great bull" said Morgan Stanely Dean Witter analyst Robert Trent, "we can only hope that they will gorge themselves upon our offering of a marginal federal funds rate cut and they will become happy and lethargic."
    Oracle Alan Greenspan said his top priests were burning incense and casting spells as fast as possible to break the horrible curse which turned all internet stocks into locusts and technology stocks into bees. Greenspan said he was also considering offering the gift of a tax cut from George Bush, the generous serpentine.