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God Condemns Building

LUBBOX, TX -- Today God condemned a building in eastern Lubbox, signaling a crackdown on derelict structures by the Almighty and the city council.
    "Lo, he who would let such an edifice stand in such insolence to Me, in such blatent violation of the most Holy of building codes, shall face the wrath of one thousand angry Angels," God said. He continued, "O wretched owner of 114 Christopher Street, let ye vacate your premises lest ye face injunction or fines of up to $500 for eight days."
    God commanded that no tenants enter the building for a period of 60 days unless otherwise notified by the Catholic Church.
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