WASHINGTON, DC -- According to DIA report to Congress released today, the US is "totally unprepared" for terrorist attacks utilizing fire-breathing dragons. "After 9/11, we must take any threat seriously," explained Sen. Arlen Specter, "no matter how unlikely they may seem, including dragons, chimeras or other mythical, non-existent creatures."
    "The dragons can somehow beat our most advanced weaponry, including Apache Helicopters, M1A1-Abrahms tanks and even wield primitive weapons such as battle-axes," the report said.
    Military officials attempted to downplay the claims. "The threat to our armed forces is not worrisome," explained Gen. Tommy Franks. "Dragons might have some limited effectiveness in the field, but we should be able to defeat them in, I don't know, say, 98 minutes."