AUSTIN, TX -- In a press conference yesterday, 19 year old First Daughter Jenna Bush "I categorically deny underage drinking on my part... in the past 30 hours. Underage drinking is wrong, but I have no comment as to whether or not I drank underage more than 30 hours ago."
    Jenna was recently cited by local police for drinking under 21 years of age at a bar near the University of Texas at Austin which she attends. She has repeatedly been spotted flanked by Secret Service Agents at fraternity parties around campus.
    "I also deny having any of those awesome pineapple shooters or those drinks with the cherries and those little cool umbrellas." adding, "those rule."