The Daily Sedative
homeaboutcontactarchivesrandom articlesearchsyndication xml

DEFCON 2 Reached For Historic 500th Time

NORAD -- Battle directors and battle director technicians huddled around the Main Defense Readiness computer screen broke out into cheers when NORAD entered DEFCON 2 for the 500th time in history.
    "We were at DEFCON 3, so we knew that at any moment it was possible," said one sector commander. "I'm so excited! I don't think I could've waited any longer!" Some military analysts said it would be years before the condition would be reached, but the landmark number arrived surprisingly quickly with 3 occurrences this month alone.
    DEFCON, an abbrieviation for "Defense Readiness Condition," summarizes the state of US nuclear defense. 5 is peacetime, 1 is imminent nuclear detonation.
    CINC-NORAD General Harold Davis gave a small speech before the ecstatic crowd. "It really is amazing to be here," he said with alarms wailing, lights flashing and bottles of champagne opening behind him, and offered a toast, "to the future!"

Related Headlines: